Mr. Bechtle: Thanks for taking the hamster over the break.
Me: No problem. Flufferella is so excited. And my boys will be, too.
Mr. Bechtle: Now, the cage won’t close fully because of her water bottle, but she can’t climb out anyway because she’s such a big hamster. (Pulling off cage lid and lifting up house.) As I mentioned, she really just likes to stay right–What? Oh, no! And just when I was saying she can’t climb out.
Me: (cackling madly)
Entire Second Grade Class: Squeaker is missing! Squeaker escaped! Everybody look for her! I bet she got eaten by the lizard. She’ll die of starvation. She’s probably in my desk!
So yeah, no hamster coming home with us over the holiday weekend because the hamster had the good sense to escape in the classroom instead of my house. I still get parent points for volunteering though.
I take a picture of my boys holding cream roses and post it to facebook, “Just getting the last few things at Costco.”
Then I think, was that really a good idea to advertise where I am at the moment?
A friend texts, “Hey if you’re still at Costco, could you possibly get me….” I was so thrilled because this was the friend who made weekly runs to Costco and Wegman’s for me while I was on bedrest with my twins. And now here she is with her first infant baby hosting in-laws for Thanksgiving and I get to pick up some parmesan, paper towels and chicken stock for her. I really was off my head with joy to do it, because even though I repaid only about 1/20th of the favor she did me, I think we’re even now. Right? I mean, I feel much better about it.
The Fluffatron 3000 arrives home from 2 hour early release in a fine Thanksgiving mood.
Fluffy: I am so lucky to be your daughter. You are a very wealthy, rich, young woman. And you’re beautiful, and you’re my best friend. You’re awesome and I love you super much. If I were anyone else’s daughter, I would not have as happy of a life.
Me: Wow! (reciprocation, yada, yada, I forgot to write down what I said, and I’m not going to make it up. But I did write down the next words out of her mouth.)
Fluffy: Mama, I feel like even when you’re not wearing mascara, your eyes are still mascaralized and eyelinered. And you have a perfect complexion. And your eyebrows are so straight. That sounds awkward and weird, but I don’t even care! Put that on your blog.
Me: Anything else?
Fluffy: Just put an emoji on it.