Fighting in the morning.
Me: We all have to share. Let’s take turns (blah, blah, blah).
Fighting in the afternoon.
Me: What’s wrong with you people? You’re so lucky! You were born in America. You have two loving parents neither of whom is dead or dying or missing. You have each other to play with. We’re in this beautiful car on this beautiful day. You just went to this awesome gym to an awesome Karate class that you all loved. You have everything. Be happy! Stop crying and fighting for one minute and be happy.
Peppers: I was being happy.
Fighting later in the afternoon.
Me: I would rather not spend the rest of my life yelling at you to make you eat food you are LUCKY to have. You CHOSE Starwars mac & cheese.
Fighting just now, 4pm.
Salty: Fluffy and I wanted the blue iPad [not the black iPad or the pink one], but Peppers took it.
Me: (Rolling eyes) Fight to the death and let me know who wins.
Salty: Fight to da death?
And then he walked away.