Uptown Funk. An awesome song the singing of which should never be attempted by 3 year-olds. “Uptown Funk you up. Uptown Funk you up” “‘Cuz Uptown Funk gonna give it to ya” are both a disaster waiting to happen. I almost took a video of the boys trying to sing this last night, but it would not have been suitable for work. So here’s the original.
Dance parties have become Kent’s way of getting the kids to go to their bedroom to get ready for bed. They have also been my way of realizing that all those years I thought Kent was “dancing” ironically, like, making fun of how nerdy white guys dance–yeah, he was just dancing.
But the great thing is nerds are in. It’s totally cool to be a bad dancer. Fluffs told me again that she’s a nerd, but also a girly girl. “Yeah, I go totally crazy over fashion,” she says. Which reminds me.
Disney is devilishly brilliant. Everything about Disneyworld is designed to part you and your money as quickly as possible. Have you heard of Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique? That’s where for a small fortune, the fairy godmothers in training can transform your daughter into the creepy kiddie pageant version of a Disney princess (sorry, was that redundant?) by doing her hair, nails and makeup.
Fluffs saw the boutique on a video about Disneyworld and it became the center of expectations universe. She thought it was one of the rides you go on that you can just wait in line for and it’s free/included. HA! The BBB salon is booked solid weeks and months in advance, but I still put in calls and found a cancellation window, so off we went.
I’m going to go ahead and admit it was one of my favorite parts of the trip. The buses all have this prerecorded special announcement that they play to everyone when a girl who’s thusly bedecked gets on. So adorable. Then all the cast members at the parks give the girls special attention and call them princess. It’s freaking amazing. I’m even going to say it was worth every penny even though Fluffers for reasons incomprehensible chose Tiana’s green dress. (Note Cinderella’s stoned-seven-year-old expression.)
And then on the first day back to school (which because of holidays and weather closures was yesterday) I did her hair in a similar hairstyle. I even sprinkled it with glitter. Because I do things right.
Flufferella: AAAAAGH!! You’re hurting me!!
Me: I’m being even more gentle than they were at the salon. You didn’t scream and holler when they were doing your hair, and I know they pulled it tighter than this.
Flufferella: That’s because I was in PUBLIC, so I tried to just hold it in because I didn’t want to hurt their feelings.
Me: Could you do that right now for me? Kidding, kidding. I’m sorry it hurts. I’m trying to be gentle.
Frankly, she looked adorable for school even though she said her ears were freezing.
I accept that I have parenting strengths and weaknesses. I’m probably never going to be that parent that gets my kids to subsist on organic kelp and acai berries, but I’m good at hair. Which of these is more important, you ask? That answer is easy: whichever you are good at. The end.
Small World Twofie! Great job ducking out of the picture, Backseat Ladies. You nailed it.