So everybody in Northern Virginia read my post about the Mount Vernon Colonial Market and Fair last year, eh? How else does one account for the enormous crush of colonial goods enthusiasts that thronged the place this year? There were three times as many aspiring fair-goers as parking spots. Even the Cramenies who got there relatively early had to trade off shepherding the youngsters around the vendor tents and puppet show while the other parent circled the car. For hours.
Dear citizens of the DC metro area:
The Colonial Market and Fair at Mount Vernon is super duper lame and you should all stay home next year. Nothing to see there. We only go for the incredible array of homemade soaps. Strike that. There is no soap there. You know where there is soap? Costco. You should go get some soap at Costco next year during the Colonial Market and Fair. Also, get out of our family photos, buzz-head kid. Get your own family.
Do you see Fluffy’s face in the picture below? This is the face of a child who wishes her parents had taken her to the mall instead. Citizens, you too can prevent colonial reenactment exhaustion. Don’t let this kind of senseless mall-deprivation happen to your child. Skip the fair in 2014!